Will It Always Be Like This....

When it comes to emotions of the heart i find myself confused. i feel that my heart goes through a rollercoaster of emotions each day. and even more so when i go back to familiar surroundings. its weird to think how a certain smell, or a familiar path once taken, or the number of an apt can flood the heart with so many different emotions. good emotions. bad emotions. they all come back in a split second it seems. i try to fight some of the emotions off and then again i try to go along with some of them. but in the end i always stand confused. i sometimes wonder why GOD has placed certain people in my life. then comes the question of which emotions to act upon. we all come in contact with tons of people daily. and within that we tend to connect with some on a higher level than most. and along with that connection comes a certain level of attraction. then comes the choice of whether or not to act on those miniscule feelings or if you just let them blow over. nine times out of ten i think we let those feelings blow over. sometimes it may take a while but all in all the feelings are never acted upon. mainly because we are afraid of rejection. afraid of putting ourself out there to only get hurt in the end. but to me it doesnt make sense to sit at home all night and think about someone to only never act upon those feelings. i say if there is an attraction or feelings are there, why not try it out. if its not suppose to work out then the feelings will go away and you will know for sure and you will never have to wonder "what if". cause the answer will have been revealed to you. but then what happens when you try it out and try to act upon your feelings to only have the other person not respond? do you continue to persevere and pursue or do you just give up? its a rough question for me to deal with. it gets old having feelings for someone and them liking you back but nothing ever works out for one reason or another. its hard to put yourself out there to only come up empty in the end. so it makes me debate. do i try harder? or do i just give it up cuase history shows that its not gonna happen, for one reason or another. these days....i just feel like givin up.